Unknown

My darling gave to me a beautiful sword for Winter’s Veil. It appears to be of an earlier Wartime. How it was found and retrieved I know not, but I suspect that some considerable magic was involved.

I have since thrown myself back into battle, but with altered perspective. The gift from Greatfather Winter, and the return to Tirisfal have changed circumstances. I had thought that all evidence of my origins was destroyed with Viere’s death; or at least, all opportunity to investigate it. It was a sacrifice that I understood and accepted.

But that acceptance is beginning to fade as I realize how much others know. Nemeiah’s curse seems to be that she remembers everything about being human, including revulsion for the dead. The rose experiment demonstrated this. She, like I, was not given a choice about whether or not our rest was eternal, and then was brought back as something that was not beautiful. Or rather, not beautiful by the standards she lived with. But within, there is very much the same human-hearted girl.

This philosophical struggle, though, is only possible because of the retention of those memories, and those standards. Those things that I cannot reach. I looked into the gift from Great-father Winter, and I saw a tiny piece of that unknown. Urukha offered to fill it by bringing me into her own family. But we discussed the flaws of this already.

The gift still sits on my desk, empty. I have not looked again.