Chivalry is Undead

Many pages have I devoted in you, journal, on the discussion of good manners and propriety. Often I criticize for what I see as a lack of it in exhibited by others. But less have I written on the scarcity of those who deserve to receive it.

There was one among my acquaintance that I thought was one such individual. When her husband abandoned her I assisted with gifts and encouragement, and it pleased me to do this. For an entire year I committed good behavior to her. But her recent indiscretion, revealed when a second person also lapsed (by describing the incident to me) has shattered this naïve opinion.

I acted coldly to her after and at first intended to remain so. But she pursued me after the last Tribe meeting with such an expression of earnestness and contrition that at the least, I resolved to tell her what had me unsettled. Vivvienne agreed to meet in private and I confessed my distress. That I no longer thought it appropriate to treat her as highly I had before, and I did not know how to behave now. Fortunately our friendship remains intact though we were not able to resolve my confusion.

As I consider it further, it seems that chivalry, and almost all of those who exercise and accept it have perished. It reminds me of my own unnatural state of undeath. Not solely the necrotic coloring and pain, but also the expired values that belonged to a different time. Honor, loyalty and even love carry new meanings now.

Yet it is the old meanings that I am designed for and give me comfort. But at the least, I know one person who will continue to receive my good behavior no matter how the rest of the world changes.